The Rube Goldberg Effect
by The Hazel-Eyed Angel
Summary: Poll winner! 2D has fallen asleep on Plastic Beach. His back now lobster red, he's in desperate need of relief. A hot summer day, a sunbite, a bottle of Aloe, and a bathing suit covered body. So what's Noodle have to do with this?... Aloe can be fun, too


**A/N **

**So, in my poll, this story won. I decided to do it. Maybe I'll start working on "The Dealbreaker" again in a week or two. **

**Anyhow, the details of Plastic Beach, such as Noodle's room… well, I kept it exactly as I have it pictured in my story "Empire Ants," so if you've read that, yay for you. I'm too lazy to describe so much of it in this story.**

**Anyhow, enjoy. It was kind of fun to write**

"**The Rube Goldberg Effect"**

**Rating: Mature**

**Oneshot: 2DxNoodle**

**Slight bit of drabble I wrote in about an hour or so…**

**I thought it was kind of cute. I would've left it at just an innocent drabble, but I already promised an M rating so… yeah…**

…**enjoy… or else**

**Leave reviews, please. So I feel more confident about doing other oneshots I have floating around my Gorillaz-haze induced, crack head. **

**Thank youz X)**

… **you better like this Mandi… you know who you are… =)**

* * *

A typical summer day down on Plastic Beach was hot, sticky, and slightly unpredictable. Today was no exception. It had been a couple of months since Noodle and Russel had arrived on this forsaken landmass, and after all the radioactive material had passed through his system, Russel was now his usual size, though it seemed as though he'd lost a bit of weight.

Noodle, on the other hand, was livid when she'd arrived. She tore that cyborg limb from limb, and Murdoc nearly fainted and shit his pants at the same time –he was so angry. But Noodle set him straight, and installed her fist in his face, thoroughly boxing his ears for what he'd done to 2D.

Of course, Noodle had been furious with 2D as well, but forgave him easily. Who could resist his petrified smile, whilst he stumbled backwards stuttering more than speaking as he apologized?

She wore her mask constantly, but they all knew what was underneath it. That nasty bruise; it now scarred her face, but she was still a beauty in most people's eyes.

But, this is getting off track now, isn't it?

On the garden patio, 2D was laying on his back on the fake, yet somewhat comfortable grass. He preferred the fake grass over the hard plastic ground of the shoreline far below him. After an hour or so of sun-soaking, he rolled onto his stomach, staring absentmindedly at the grass as it rolled in the light breeze, which carried the pleasant smell of fresh air and salt, slightly mixed with fish, but that was easily ignored. It smelled much more rotten closer to the ground level. And this was one of the best places away from that whale, though it was told to leave a while ago.

Without realizing it, 2D slowly drifted off into dreamland, where zombies were his best mates and occasionally, a narwhal would chase him down, and then he would laugh as it swallowed Murdoc whilst he cursed and muttered something about needing to finish his rum first.

* * *

With nothing but her two-piece, green bikini covering her tiny frame, Noodle had decided to take the lift back up to the garden patio. She wasn't wearing her cat-mask, an unusual look for her lately.

She and, unbeknownst to her, 2D were the only ones who ventured off of the actual garden patio and onto the grass. Of course, _she_ came here to jump from the immense diving board that no one but her was brave enough to jump off of, and that was exactly what she was here to do.

It was late in the evening, and the sun was setting, so this would have to be her last jump of the day. She stared blankly toward her destination. Her foot was caught by something squishy, which yelped when she kicked it, but _it_ had made _her_ trip and land on top of it.

It wailed, and rolled over on top of Noodle. She grunted, then pushed it off of her. She stood, wiping small bits of plastic and garbage off of her body. "What the hell are you doing!" She questioned, annoyed.

He whimpered, sitting up and groaning. "I wos sleepin', till yew wen' an' jumped on me," he told her as he lifted and examined his arms.

"It's not _my_ fault you happened to be in my way," she scoffed.

"Yeah, wull," he started, then sighed. "Whotever."

She grimaced, "What?"

He looked up at her, his face pained. He leaned forward, trying to get to his feet, but he yelped and groaned, falling back onto his bum. Noodle laughed, then smiled down at him sadly. "2D, did you forget to put on sunblock?"

He returned his gaze to her face, his lip pouted and his eyebrows scrunched together. He nodded. "Yeah, I forgot. Now me back's awl red an' ih hurts," he whined.

She chuckled, then offered her hand to him. He grinned and took it. She pulled him to his feet quickly, and his knees almost buckled under the pain. He yelped again.

"Aw, ih _hurts_," he complained.

She smirked, looking up at him, "I know."

He frowned, trying to keep himself from smirking as well. "Tha's not very nice, Noodle." Her smirked played itself out into a full-blown grin now. "_Hey_," he chirped. Her face dropped now, but she was still grinning. "Can't I go take me pain killers now?" He asked childishly.

She arched her eyebrow, "Those won't help with a sunburn, 2D."

He groaned, "But ih _hurts_!"

She chuckled, "Re_lax_, Stu. I've got aloe in my bathroom."

His face became blank, then he grinned, "Oh, well tha's great. How long do yeh fink it'll take yeh te bring ih back up 'ere?"

She shook her head, "2D, I'm not going to risk taking it out of my room. It's my last bottle."

He frowned, "So yeh aren' gonna make me feel bettah? Yew're jus' gowna dangle ih infronna me face and laugh…"

She rolled her eyes and dragged him along with her. He groaned out of both laziness and pain. She pulled him over the wall, watching him carefully to make sure he didn't lose his balance while he was distracted with the stinging.

They took the lift down to the Plastic Beach entrance and, his hand still in her tiny grip, 2D was forced to follow Noodle and her thong-covered feet. He was forced to walk barefoot along the hard ground towards the lighthouse.

"Owch," he yelped, hopping on one foot whilst he continued trying to keep pace with Noodle. "Ahhh heh," his other foot had been poke by a particularly sharp piece of plastic. He shook his foot, still trying to keep up and shake the plastic off the bottom of his foot. Once it was free, he sighed. "Hhh'I don' like t'is game," he moaned, staggering forward.

Noodle smirked. "What game?" She asked curiously.

"Te game where everyfin wonts te stab me foot," he complained.

She rolled her eyes, and opened her door, waiting for 2D to go inside. He dashed into the lounge, grateful for the soft, plush floor that comforted his abused feet. He sat on her large lounge chair and waited while she wandered into her lavatory without a care in the world.

She searched the cabinet behind her mirror, and saw the clear bottle full of blue liquid, and grinned as she took hold of it. She opened it, and her nose was met with the cold, stinging smell of the aloe. She closed it again and went back into her lounge. She saw 2D sitting with his hands in his lap, his fingers twiddling with each other.

She sighed, "Roll onto your stomach, Stu."

He flashed a confused look up at her. "Huh… oh righ'," he remembered. He turned to the side and stretched out his long body across his large lounge chair as he rested on his stomach. He crossed his arms in front of him and rested him chin on his forearms as he waited for her to do whatever it was she'd planned on doing.

She sat on her knees on the chair, facing 2D. She opened the bottle and poured some of the liquid into her palm, then leaned over 2D and began rubbing it onto the middle of his back. He flinched, his skin irritated, but he sighed as the aloe began working its magic and cooling his hot skin.

She rubbed it on every bit of red covering his body. She started with his back, then moved onto the exposed bit of his neck. Next she moved onto his legs, blushing as she rubbed the liquid in from his swim short's line, down to his feet. He twitched as she rubbed into his legs, fighting the urge to pull away out of embarrassment and desire for her to continue.

She finished with his arms, rubbing the aloe in from his shoulders, over his biceps, and onto the parts of his forearms that had been exposed. 2D's nose scrunched when he smelled the stinging liquid. Once Noodle finished, she closed the cap of the bottle and placed it on the table close by the chair.

"Alright," she breathed, her face flushed and tinted pink. "I think that should do it."

He turned his head toward her, and smiled widely, his eyes closing. "Fanks, love. I feel loads bettah." She nodded. By now, almost all of the liquid had dried, but it still left the cooling sensation on 2D's skin.

Noodle stood, stretching her arms above her head. She did not appreciate having to crouch for such a long period of time, but she didn't mind it. Nor did she blame 2D for being forgetful. 2D stared, wide-eyed as her exposed body was stretched out before him. As Noodle turned around, he noticed something that made him smirk. "Oi, Noodle," he caught her attention. She turned toward him, the bottle of aloe now in her hand. He sat up, his feet now hanging off the edge of the chair. "Yew got a bit of a sunbite on yer back, too," he chuckled.

She arched an eyebrow at his odd name for the sunburn. "So… what does that mean?"

He grinned, "C'mere, so's I can put some o'tha' dandy stuff on yeh."

"It doesn't hurt, 2D. It's not as bad as yours," she explained. "It's just a little pink."

Still grinning, he took hold of her wrist and gently pulled her forward, "_So,_ whot if ih hurts later?"

She sighed. "Then it'll hurt _later_," she huffed, not wanting to be tended to, but not resisting 2D's administrations.

"T'en yew shou' take care of ih now," he fired, smirking as he took the bottle in his hand and turned Noodle so her back was facing him.

He squirted a small amount onto his palm while Noodle crossed her arms over her stomach with a grunt. 2D rolled his eyes. Clearly her teenage hormones still lurked inside of her. He put the bottle on the ground and as he began rubbing the liquid onto her back, he stared at his hand, mesmerized. His hands became slower and slower, until they had completely stopped and the liquid had evaporated. He brushed his fingers along her ghostly skin, and she shivered, turning her head to look at him curiously.

"Er -Are you done, 2D," she asked nervously.

He blinked, and pulled his hands away, "Oh, er… um, yeah. Sorry, love. Just sorta… uh, I fink I'm lost…" She turned her body, facing him once more.

She bent down, so she was eye level with him sitting on the low lounge chair. "Are you okay, 2D," she brushed her fingers along the side of his face.

He shifted his gaze to her face, and stared at her, his mouth slightly agape. She became tense after a moment, and nervously brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. 2D examined her every move as she did this, and once she began to stand upright, he slowly cupped both sides of her face in his hands and brought her face gently down to his. He exhaled as he brought her lips down to his own.

She flushed, wide-eyed at this sudden gesture and new sensation tingling through her body. She took a breath, and returned the kiss, leaning into him. He wrapped his arms around her behind and pulled her onto his lap.

He traced his fingers along her back, and she shivered, wrapping her arms around his neck. His tongue traced along her lips, demanding entrance. She gasped, and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth and moan, purring into her throat. She shuddered, following 2D's example and allowing her tongue to dance with his.

He grunted when her tongue grazed along the gap in his teeth and she grinned. He stood momentarily, with her in his grip, his lips still locked with hers. He released her now kiss-swollen lips, and grinned when she looked slightly hurt as he pulled away. He laid her down on the comfortably large chair and straddled her hips. His hand grazed her body, tracing from her neck, over her breast, and down to her hips as he sucked vigorously at the skin of her neck, leaving his mark.

He reached around her back and stuck his finger through the knot at the back of her top, and pulled it loose. Once it was free, he gently pulled the offending garment over her head and tossed it to the side onto the floor.

By now, Noodle was tomato red, and her stomach was doing backflips. 2D smiled as he gazed down at her in all her vulnerable splendor. He quickly captured her lips with his own once more and caressed her body. She moaned as his hands slid down her collar, grazing her breasts. He pulled back and kissed her lips once more, then moved down to capture one small nipple in his mouth, sucking and pulling as his fingers gave attention to her other breast. She gasped, her back arching forward and her fingers digging into the soft fabric of the chair.

As he moved onto her other breast, she moaned, her eyes beginning to haze with pleasure. He ground his member against her hips and she grunted, her eyes seeing fireworks. He took her hands and pulled them around his chest, wrapping them around his back.

She rubbed his back, her hands tracing up and down his sides while he kissed her lips, invading her mouth, his tongue dancing as it tasted her sweet flavour. She hummed, the vibrations sending tremours down 2D's spine as he growled, hooking a finger around her bathing-suit covered bottom. He slid them down her legs, and she kicked them off her feet onto the floor, brushing her hands through his hair. He planted feathery kisses along her jaw, listening to her moan as he ground his hips into hers.

She whimpered, breathing heavily and latching onto his hair tightly. He sat up quickly, removing his shorts from his hips and pushing them down his legs, then kicked them off as he came back down to suck on Noodle's lips hungrily. She trembled, tracing her hands up and down his sides. He moved his knees between her legs, and she sucked in a deep breath, gasping as she stared up at him, flushed. He met her eyes, sending a jolt of electricity down her back. He bent in towards her and kissed her lips, then pulled back and buried his face in the crook of her neck. She latched onto his shoulders tightly as he positioned himself at her center and thrust himself deep inside her core. She howled with pain as her body panicked with the sudden intrusion and expanding. He gasped, his body pulsating with exhilaration as her tight body squeezed him, and he desperately fought to keep control and hold still.

After a moment, he looked back at her face, and kissed her eyelids, which fluttered open as he kissed her lips and pulled out slightly, then rolled his hips back into her. She moaned, returning his kisses with vigor. He rolled his hips into hers once more, shuddering as she began to rock her hips into his, urging him to continue. He rested his cheek against her face, panting. She began kissing along his face, sucking at his earlobe.

He shivered, pulling out and grunting as he quickened his pace. Noodle's head lolled back, her body arching forward as she groaned in pleasure. "2D," she moaned lightly.

He continued racing after his breath as he kept his rhythm, capturing her lips in his own and plunging into her mouth. She opened her mouth widely, meeting his hips thrust for thrust as she sucked in a deep breath through her nose. She clutched her arms around his chest and he took hold of her leg, pulling it over his hip and pulling them into a slight angle. She grunted loudly at the sudden sensation. He moved his hand down to her core and she gasped as he began manipulating her most sensitive area, matching his finger's pace with each buck.

She breathed loudly as the tension began to grow in her abdomen, and her core was on fire. 2D thrust his tongue deep into her throat, and she shuddered as her body began to reach its limits. He groaned as his body became tight and he seed was released, and she moaned as her own body came to its climax, pulsing and milking 2D, extending his own orgasm. He continued his thrusts, which had her groaning loudly every time their hips crashed together, and she screamed 2D's name as her body became hot and her energy suddenly evaporated, leaving her in nothing but the aftermath of pure ecstasy.

Her body twitched as 2D pulled himself out and laid down beside her. Still panting, he pulled her body against him and buried his face in her hair, breathing in the sweet scent.

"Can we do tha' every time I geh a sunbite?"

She chuckled, burying her face in his sweat-covered chest.

* * *

**"I don't like this game" A trademark catchphrase, developed by me. I use it to describe anything I don't like doing. Example: standing in queue at Disneyland... I most definitely do _not_ like that game... feel free to use it... =D**

**Because you can't see… my eye just twitched. Well, hopefully you liked this steamy little oneshot. I thought it was cute… besides the steamy parts. Anyhow, this song is perfect for their *ahem* lovemaking scene:**

**The All-American Rejects - Dance Inside**

_You don't have to move, you don't have to speak  
Lips full biting  
You're staring me down, a glance makes me weak  
Eyes full striking  
Now I'm twisted up when I'm twisted with you  
Brush so lightly  
And time trickles down and I'm breathing for two  
Squeeze so tightly_

_I'll be fine, you'll be fine  
This moment seems so long  
Don't waste new, precious time  
We'll dance inside the song_

_What makes the want to shake you down?_  
_Each touch belongs to each new sound_  
_Say now you want to shake me too_  
_Move down to me, slip into you_

_She sinks in my mind as she sheds through her skin_  
_Touch, sight, taste like fire_  
_Hands do know what eyes no longer defend_  
_Hands to fuel desire_

_I'll be fine, you'll be fine  
This moment seems so long  
Don't waste new, precious time  
We'll dance inside the song_

_What makes the want to shake you down?_  
_Each touch belongs to each new sound_  
_Say now you want to shake me too_  
_Move down to me, slip into you_

_And I'll be fine, you'll be fine_  
_Is this fine? I'm not fine_  
_Give me pieces, give me things to stay awake_

_What makes the want to shake you down?_  
_Each touch belongs to each new sound_  
_Say now you want to shake me too_  
_Move down to me, slip into you_

_What makes the want to shake you down?_  
_Each touch belongs to each new sound_  
_Say now you want to shake me too_  
_Move down to me, slip into you_

_Move down to me slip into you..._


End file.
